Before Phil

I kinda think that I am wasting my life away.
But then, I can't really change my plans now.
And is not as if I can really run to Cambodia, away from NS and be a beggar there.
(Celest would be very happy, so would Felicia, and a few others)
But is not as if I can find work now anyway.
I really don't have money le though.
Ok, last trip up in a few days.
(I have to endure budget air for the first time in my life OMG)
(What if the plane crash?)
(Then the last thing PC would remember will be that I say I want to eat Jap food and he didn't let me)
Although I would be missing the OCIP outing and other stuff like HW?
(Just to make him happy lol)
OMG and also Christmas and New Year, and when YZ and JH come out from NS?
(They sound very happy in NS)
I suppose things will turn out fine someday.

Or not.
I think there are things called anchoring rocks?
Then are there anchoring rocks in life?
Things that you depend on for stability and comfort.
Things that when removed will have great consequences.
Are these things called friends?
I am scared of losing my things. lol
And is not just because I am not a nice person.

And yea.
I think I want to change the blog skin.
Nice people somewhere out there.
Can help me?